December Position of the Month: Come Out on Top

 Written by Katie Mitchell, M.A., NCC, CST, LPC

Lead Therapist at Heights Family Counseling

It’s the final month of 2022, so it only seems right for the highlighted position-of-the-month to be the Come Out on Top.  Here is your friendly reminder from your local sex therapists to prioritize some time for physical and emotional intimacy with your partner(s) during the chaos of the holidays.  So get out those calendars and create some intentionally with one another.  A sexual experience is a great way to get your blood flowing, as well as an opportunity to release the connecting/stress-relieving neurotransmitters that are so vital during this stressful time of year.  This is also the height of cold and flu season, so please continue to be intentional about washing your hands and using the restroom before and after a sexual experience.  As always, I continue to recommend beginning any sexual experience by doing some light stretching together to help avoid injuries and/or muscle cramps that might arise during a sexual experience, as this is still the most common sexual injury. 

Ideally, you and your partner would try out the Come Out on Top atop a soft, flat, and supportive surface, like a bed or sofa.  The penetrating partner will sit, kneeling on their knees, and leaning back on their heels.  Once leaning back, this partner will also place their arms back behind themselves to support their upper body.  This will look similar to the Thunderbolt pose in yoga, but with the individual’s torso leaning back and their arms back and out to support behind themselves.  The partner being penetrated will climb onto their partner’s lap (positioning themselves face-to-face), sitting onto their partner’s genitals for the initiation of penetration.  Ideally, once penetration has occurred, the partner being penetrated would lift their feet off the soft surface, so that the penetrating partner could use their hips, core, and glutes, to bounce them on their lap.  If that feels too daunting to try, the partner being penetrated can always help to support themselves (and their partner) by placing their feet on top of the supportive surface and on the outside of their partner’s hips.  The partner being penetrated can also hold on to their partners upper body for support.  Again, once penetration has occurred, try to communicate verbally and nonverbally about what feels pleasurable or what needs adjusting.

For the penetrating partner, this position will work their triceps, core, and glutes.  For the partner being penetrated, this position will work their core, glutes, and quads.  It is recommended to try this position out for 5 to 10 minutes. 

Here’s to Coming Out on Top of this year with your partner(s)!  For more information on the Come Out on Top (including image) can be found on pages 103 of The Kama Sutra Workout, and this book can be purchased from Amazon here.

Feel free to set up an appointment for sex therapy, please contact us today.