August Position of the Month: Steamy Stretch: From Our Certified Sex Therapist

Written by Katie Michell, NCC, LPC, CST

Certified Sex Therapist

With COVID-19 cases still surging in several states and the Houston area, you and your partner are likely still spending a great deal of one on one time together!  Here’s to trying out our highlighted position of the month, in order to help ease the stress of quarantine.  The two of you might feel more comfortable following the recommendations that have been posted for Sex and the Coronavirus Pandemic (found here).  If you or your partner are not feeling well, you might consider delaying sexually engagement.  As a healthy sex practice, please continue to wash your hands before and after a sexual experience.  Plus, if it helps you both to feel more comfortable, start your shared sexual experience by taking a shower together!

August’s highlighted position of the month, is the Steamy Stretch.  While a sexual experience is a time to emotionally connect with one another, it is also a great time to get your blood pumping and release physical energy together.  In the midst of a quarantine, remember that a sexual experience will release Oxytocin and other beneficial endorphins that will help you both feel bonded to one another and release stress/tension.  As I always recommend, start by doing some light stretching together to help avoid injuries and/or muscle cramps that might arise during a sexual experience (the most common sexual injury).  

Ideally, you and your partner would try out the Steamy Stretch position out on a supportive, soft surface, such as an ottoman or bed.  The two of you will likely have to work together to work out height differences between kneeling/standing and the height of the soft surface, in order to maximize pleasure for you both.  For example, a shorter bed frame will likely work for this experience, but for taller bed frames, the two of you might want to try out an ottoman or the penetrating partner will have to stand.  The partner being penetrated will lean back on the soft, supportive surface, allowing for ample relaxation and access to stimulate themselves (if desired) during this sexual experience.  The penetrating partner can either kneel, stand, or a combination of kneeling on one knee and supportively bending the other to support themselves.  The penetrating partner will work their glutes and quads together in order to maximize their thrusting ability.  The penetrating partner will also help to support their partner’s lower body and open their hip space by holding onto one of their legs (preferably holding around the ankle area).  Both legs do not have to be supported by the penetrating partner; holding and supporting only one will help to provide enough extra hip space for maximizing stimulation.  Helping to open the hip space will aid in stimulation and pleasure for both partners, especially for the partner being penetrated!

Once penetration has occurred, the two of you will work together to create a thrusting pace that is pleasurable for all.  It is often better to start out slowly and then increase movement as you both feel and express pleasure aloud.  For the penetrating partner, this position will work their deltoids, lats, glutes, quads, and hamstrings.  For the partner being penetrated, this position will work their core and adductors.

It is recommended to try this position out for 1 to 5 minutes.  Try to be conscious of foreplay and be sure to have lubrication on hand!  Lubrication can be especially important when trying out a new position that is not routine for you both.  Plus, it is always nice to have lubrication be a grab away, versus being out when you’re in need!

Here’s to trying out something new out with one another, especially while quarantining together!  More information for this specific position (including a visual image) can be found on page 89 of The Kama Sutra Workout, and this book can be purchased from Amazon here.

If you think you would benefit from sex therapy, please reach out to Heights Family Counseling for a free consultation to see how our experienced sex therapists could help you.

Katie Mitchell M.A., LPC, NCC, CST, earned her Bachelor of Arts in Psychology from Hendrix College and her Master of Art in Clinical Mental Health Counseling from the CACREP program at Sam Houston State University.  In addition to being a Certified Sex Therapist, she is also a Licensed Professional Counselor, Nationally Certified Counselor and Telemental Health Certified.  She has significant experience in working in the mental health field; this includes prior experience in private practice, community agency, therapeutic day treatment school, and collegiate research.  Katie is also an active member of the following professional organizations to stay up to date on the latest research: American Counseling Association (ACA), Texas Counseling Association (TCA), Houston Association for Marriage and Family Therapy (HAMFT), Chi Sigma Iota, and American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT). To book a session, click Here.