How Many Sessions Will This Take?

 Written by Ashley Taylor, M.S.W, LMSW

Licensed Master Social Worker

A very common question from first-time clients: How many sessions will this take? From a financial perspective, this question seems very valid. People want to know what their financial obligation is going to be before getting started, which is definitely information worth knowing. But there is another reason this question is asked, outside of understanding financial obligation: How long until I see results?

This goes for individual counseling, couples counseling, or counseling for children. Although we can become flooded with questions as a spouse, parent, or individual when it comes to beginning the therapeutic process, there are a lot of misconceptions about what the therapeutic process looks like. 

When we think of therapy as a journey, not a destination or something to conquer, we are better able to make sense of what is to come when entering therapy. Beginning therapy is a commitment to change, not just a quick fix to issues you, your relationship, or your child may have been battling for an extended period of time. Better put, you can’t put a bandaid on a gushing wound and expect it to heal properly, nor is there always a timeframe for when the wound can heal, depending on how deep it is. 

In order for therapy to be beneficial, there has to be an internal buy-in. When we buy into the therapeutic process, we are able to open ourselves up to the healing that therapy guides you in. Thinking back to the initial question of “How many sessions will this take?”, we have to ask ourselves, what exactly is “this”? Healing? Understanding? The problem being “fixed”? It is important to ask yourself these questions because whatever “this” is looks different for everyone, also meaning that the path to get there looks different too.

 So now that we have established that the number of sessions each person attends in their own therapeutic journey varies based on many factors, what is it that you can expect going into therapy? In building a relationship with your therapist, you are able to establish goals you are looking to tackle within your therapeutic experience, further allowing you to collaborate with your therapist to figure out what steps need to be taken in order for the goals to be accomplished. 

Oftentimes, couples will seek out services in an effort to save their marriage, or understand how to more effectively communicate (among many other things, just giving a few examples). Physically showing up for sessions is one thing, but putting an honest effort into your journey looks different. Being able to see your partner's point of view while also recognizing your own, takes a certain level of commitment.  

Individuals seek out services to assist them in processing through various issues and helping them to cope with their reality of dealing with things like anxiety or depression (among many other things, just giving a few examples). Being able to see yourself as someone who deals with anxiety but finding beneficial ways to cope with that takes a certain level of commitment. 

Parents seek out services for their children who are having difficulty processing through new changes, or working towards displaying more prosocial behaviors (among many other things, just giving a few examples). Because a child has a certain level of understanding of emotional processing, the process requires a certain level of commitment from the parents.

Going into therapy with a goal of knowing when services will be terminated sets you up in a position to not be fully committed to the process. By seeing the healing process as a journey without an endpoint, you are able to celebrate all of the little milestones that occur along the way, instead of beating yourself up for not making the progress that you believe you should have made by a certain point. While the end goal, whatever that may be, is something to look forward to, it is important to remain present and invested in the process, instead of fixating on the end date. The truth of human nature is that as individuals, we can never be “fully healed”. We just learn to carry the difficulties we face in a way that makes our lives more manageable. As a couple, individual, or parent, we are all capable of reaching our goals; we just have to make sure that our intentions behind reaching those goals are coming from a place of deeper understanding of self or spouse so that we can benefit from the tools and resources that we have learned that help us to build our capacity for self-regulation and connection. 

Contact us today to set up a free consultation to see how we can help you.