Teen Heartbreak: How to Help Them Heal

 Written by Morgan Phelps, M.S., LPC, NCC

Licensed Professional Counselor

 It's completely normal for teens to need some time to process and feel upset when facing a breakup. Everyone copes differently, and it's important to recognize and respect these differences. It can be hard to know how to help them through this challenging time. Here are a few tips when your teen is facing heartbreak.

 Encourage Self-Care

Breakups can take a toll on both physical and mental well-being. Encourage the teen to take care of themselves by getting enough sleep, eating healthily, and engaging in activities they enjoy. Encourage them to prioritize self-care and do things that make them feel good.

Start Up a Conversation - No Judgement Zone

As a parent or caregiver, it can be frustrating and concerning when your child doesn't want to open up about what they're going through. However, it's crucial to create a supportive environment where they feel comfortable expressing themselves without fear of judgment or criticism. Open-ended questions can also be helpful in facilitating conversations about their feelings. Try asking how they're feeling or if there's anything specific you can do to support them. When trying to support your child through a difficult time, it can be helpful to validate and normalize their feelings. If it feels appropriate, share your own experiences, but be careful not to minimize their individual experience or pain. Share the perspective that this is a painful and important part of life. Acknowledge their emotions and validate their struggles by saying things like, "This is really hard for you, and it makes sense that you need time to process." Don’t take it too personal if your teen doesn’t want to talk to you about the breakup. Encourage them to talk with friends, this can sometimes sit better with teens than parental advice.

Provide a Distraction

While it's essential to acknowledge their feelings, sometimes distractions can be helpful in taking their mind off the breakup, even if just for a little while. Offering to spend quality time together outside the house or engaging in activities they enjoy can provide a much-needed distraction and boost their mood. Encourage them to spend time with friends, as they can be a great way to combat the loneliness that comes with a breakup.

Know When It’s Time to Get Professional Help

One key thing to look out for is any behavior that suggests isolation or withdrawal. When someone starts to exhibit depressive behaviors or loses interest in activities they once enjoyed, it may be a sign that they're struggling internally. This could manifest as spending more time alone in their room, avoiding social interactions, changes in eating and sleeping, or showing disinterest in hobbies and extracurricular activities. These are all potential red flags that shouldn't be ignored.

It's normal for adolescents to need time to process and cope with difficult emotions. As parents or caregivers, it's essential to be vigilant for signs of distress and create a supportive environment where they feel comfortable expressing themselves. Remember, it's okay not to have all the answers, but being there for them can make all the difference.

If you feel your teen needs extra support, contact us to see how teen therapy can help.