What the Heck is Sex Coaching?
Written by Rachael Lindberg, M.S., LPC-Associate
Supervised by Erin Alexander, LPC-S
Psychotherapist & Sex Coach Certification Candidate
Talking about sex still tends to be a taboo topic and we aren’t sure who to go to when we’re experiencing painful sex, delayed or early ejaculation, or which sex toys to use alone or with a partner. We get embarrassed, shy, and even shameful just thinking about our wants and desires for the bedroom. Most of these embarrassments come from misconceptions or beliefs we were taught in adolescence as well as the lack of educational, comprehensive sex education in public schools. Sex positivity was not a movement until recently and, even then, it continues to be met with shock or even disgust. Apparently, secrets are best kept in the bedroom or confined to gossip when meeting up with your friend group, if even that! However, the fact of the matter is that comprehensive sex education and adequate knowledge about sexual health is a public health issue, which means that there are actually a variety of options for addressing and treating sexual health concerns.
Introducing: Sex Coaching
Just to start off with, the sex coach does not engage in sexual intercourse with clients, just putting that out there in case anyone is confused. Sex coaching is a modality of treatment for sexual health and relationship concerns. A 300-hour certification course can be provided through accredited institutes. Individuals obtaining a sex coach certification are sometimes also licensed mental health professionals, such as myself, or individuals in other health professions (yoga instructors, obstetricians/gynecologists, medical doctors, or physical therapists specializing in pelvic dysfunctions) seeking professional development and additional training. Sex coaches are not restricted by a state license and can see clients throughout the U.S. Some major differences that make sex coaching differ from sex therapy are the inability to bill insurance (which could help protect privacy), focus on the present problem and solution-oriented focus, focus on sexual health rather than mental health, and not assigning a diagnosis to the client (which is mostly for insurance purposes anyway).
Sex coaching addresses concerns such as difficulties with orgasming, emotional or sexual intimacy, painful sex, erectile or ejaculatory dysfunction, relationship conflicts, body image, sex education, and kinks/fetishes. Sex coaching places an emphasis on present functioning utilizing solution-oriented strategies to solve a specific concern. Mental health disorders or past trauma are assessed and a referral is made to a sex therapist or a licensed mental health professional to address those concerns. Physical concerns that are medical in nature will be referred to a PCP for evaluation. Individuals or couples can be seen together or alone for sex coaching, depending on the presenting concern. Confidentiality limits are the same as if seen for individual or couples therapy.
The Sex Coaching Process
The first session is a general intake session to assess the client’s current concerns and past sexual history. From there, goals are built and home assignments are given to foster learning and growth by using the skills learned in the client’s environment. Sex coaching is sometimes a one-time educational session or it can be a little longer depending on treatment needs. Sessions can be conducted via a HIPAA-compliant video chat platform or in-person. Sex coaching aims to be non-judgmental and collaborative when working with clients. We teach, inform, instruct, and are cheerleaders providing encouragement to enhance knowledge and passion for sexual health positivity.
Don’t deny yourself the possibility of healthy, pleasurable sex. Not all sexual health concerns are wrapped up in mental health disorders. Sometimes, we just need some advice on the best sex toy to use for the G-Spot or how to build endurance in bed. Those are problems we can find solutions for in sex coaching.
To learn more, please contact our counseling office.