So You’ve Already Broken Your New Year’s Resolution

 Written by Morgan Phelps, M.S.

Psychotherapist

We’ve all been there…so ambitious to kick our bad habits, promised ourselves this year’s going to be different, and then feeling completely defeated by mid-January. No, it’s not just you. Here are some tips to get your motivation back and get back on track:

Know why. Why do you want to accomplish this goal? Is it to improve your quality of life? Or is it because you feel like you “should”? Make sure your reasons are for you, and not what others expect from you.

Make it easy on yourself. Maybe that looks like setting a reminder on your phone or scheduling it on your calendar. If it’s important to you, make it non-negotiable. Bottom-line is you’re more likely to execute your plan if you do a little bit of prep work beforehand.

Attach it to a habit. If you’d like to tell yourself one positive affirmation a day, attach it to brushing your teeth. You brush your teeth every day, so now when you’re brushing your teeth tell yourself “I am __________”.

There’s nothing wrong with you, and there’s nothing wrong with wanting some change. It takes strength and awareness to notice room for improvement. Now go do all the things!

Start small. If you goal is to increase self-care, you can start by giving yourself 10 minutes. You’re likely not going to go from completely neglecting your self-care, to disciplined self-care every day. It’s important that you can also feel successful in accomplishing your goals. Once you achieve that first small goal, make it a bit bigger. 

Set realistic goals. Don’t set yourself up for failure. Make sure the goal your setting is something you can actually accomplish in the time frame you create.

Get help. A big part of the therapeutic process is developing goals and ways to achieve them. You don’t have to be on the brink of a breakdown to go to therapy. Having goals in therapy is a great place to start. If you’re not ready to commit to therapy, find an accountability partner. Tell your friends, family, etc., and let them know you want some help accomplishing your goals. Make sure these are people you trust and have your best interest in mind.

Plan for setbacks. Setbacks happen and that’s okay. It’s great to prepare for times you start to fall off track. Ask yourself these questions – “How will I notice that I’m no longer working towards my goal?” “What can I do to refocus?”

Contact Heights Family Counseling to discuss options for adult therapy in Houston or San Antonio.