January Position of the Month: Blissful Bend

Written by Katie Mitchell, M.A., LPC, NCC, CST

Certified Sex Therapist

Since COVID-19 is still surging all over, you and your partner are likely still spending a great deal of one-on-one time together.  Add in coming out of the holiday session and COVID fatigue, y’all might really be in need of a connecting and tension relieving exercise!  The two of you might feel more comfortable following the recommendations that have been posted for Sex and the Coronavirus Pandemic (found here).  If you or your partner are not feeling well, you might consider delaying sexual engagement.  As a healthy sex practice, please continue to wash your hands before and after a sexual experience.  Plus, if it helps you both to feel more comfortable, start your shared sexual experience by taking a shower together!

January’s highlighted position of the month is the Blissful Bend.  While a sexual experience is a time to emotionally connect with one another, it is also a great time to get your blood pumping and release physical energy together.  In the midst of a quarantine, remember that a sexual experience will release Oxytocin and other beneficial endorphins that will help you both feel bonded to one another and release stress/tension.  Start this experience by doing some light stretching together to help avoid injuries and/or muscle cramps that might arise during a sexual experience (the most common sexual injury). 

Ideally, you and your partner would try out the Blissful Bend on a soft supportive surface, like a bed or blanket on the floor.  The penetrating partner will sit on a supportive surface with their legs apart in a V shape (as though they are stretching).  The partner being penetrated will kneel into a position similar to Child’s pose; however instead of stretching out their arms, they will support themselves with their elbows and forearms.  The partner being penetrated will kneel back into their partner and have control over penetration and thrust speed.  The penetrating partner can place their arms/hands on the shoulders/back of their partner.  The two of you will still want to work together to create a thrusting pace that is pleasurable for all.  As usual, it is better to start out slowly and then increase movement as you both feel and express pleasure aloud.  This might be the perfect position to change things up for you and your partner!  For the penetrating partner, this position will work their core.  For the partner being penetrated, this position will work their abdominals, glutes, and quads.

It is recommended to try this position out for 5 to 10 minutes.  As you might guess this position requires a bit of flexibility, so try to be conscious of foreplay to warm up and be sure to have lubrication on hand.   Lubrication can be especially important when trying out a new position that is not routine for you both.  Plus, it is always nice to have lubrication be a grab away, versus being out when you’re in need!

I hope you and your partner are able to carve out some specific time to engage emotionally and sexually with one another.  Plus, you will get to potentially add something new to your sexual repertoire with this new position!  For more information for this specific position (including image) can be found on page 173 of The Kama Sutra Workout, and this book can be purchased from Amazon here.

SERVICES KATIE OFFERS AT HEIGHTS COUNSELING

Katie offers a variety of mental health services for teens, adults, and couples at our Houston Heights Therapy Clinic. Her mental health services include: adult therapy, Tween and Teen Counseling, life transitions, couples therapy, work burnout, LGBTQ Friendly Therapy, depression treatment, Alternative Relationships, Sex Therapy, and anxiety treatment. She also offers online therapy in Texas to meet your mental health needs when you can’t make it to our therapy clinic. To learn more, please contact our counseling office or visit Katie Mitchell.