Divorce can be a challenging and emotional journey for everyone involved, especially for children who may find themselves caught in the midst of changing family dynamics.
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Considering separation or divorce is very difficult and something that we hope we never have to even think about when we choose to commit to someone. Separation and divorce are often accompanied by a variety of emotions including anger, sadness, grief, resentment, fear, and even relief and empowerment.
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Going through a divorce is one of the most stressful and painful experiences one can go through. Yet, it’s also such a common experience with about 50 % of marriages ending in divorce. Divorce is a life transition that feels a bit like grief. You grieve the marriage you hoped for, the life that you planned for, the significant other that you fell in love with, and the person you were while married. In an instant, life is flipped upside down. And that is just the emotional grief and stress.
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I recently wrote about the predictors of divorce. As negative as the topic probably felt, it was very necessary. If we don’t know what to work on, counseling wouldn’t be very effective at strengthening the relationship.
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“Will my marriage last?” Wouldn’t that be a terrifying question to hear answered when you start couples therapy? However, Dr. John Gottman and his wife, Dr. Julie Gottman, have spent a career answering that question. In fact, with approximately 94 percent accuracy, Dr. Gottman has found a formula to predict the stability of a relationship within 15 minutes of meeting a couple.
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Ending a relationship is something that causes many to enter counseling. What happens when the person you normally would go to for support and relief, is now the person that is causing these negative feelings? How do you learn how to function without this support in your life? These are the questions that I witness daily.
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